I used to dream of being published
I used to dream of being published. Well, I used to dream I’d be a lot of things. I wanted to be a singer, actor, FBI agent, swine nutritionist, model, motivational speaker, journalist, pharmacist, politician, scientist, lobbyist, humanitarian, and baker. The scenes of my life would play through my mind as I imagined what profession I would choose. The overall question being, what kind of impact do I want to make?
Regardless of what I chose, the general vision always included two things:
1. Making some type of positive difference in the world
2. I would use my voice
Sometimes I worry that my worry and realism kept me from pursuing a few of those dreams. In the same breath, I tried to stomp out my desire to bake at a very young age, and still ended up in the field, so I digress.
I remember standing on a step stool (my guess is 5-7) in our kitchen helping my mom make the famous fudge nut bars and thinking “maybe I’ll be a baker”, and then in the same moment going “there is no financial security there. I better choose something else”. I laugh at that now because I have found myself in the baking industry (with wonderful financial security) combining my love for science, baking, and rule following to become a Regulatory Specialist. I also laugh because what child is thinking about future financial/economical security at that age? Looking back, I think it was less about the baking and more about the real risk involved in being an entrepreneur. An idea that still scares me.
But how many of us stomped out a dream as a kid or adult, because we didn’t think we could make money at it? How many of us thought that a career path would be too hard to get to? That we weren’t qualified enough? Or smart enough? Or brave enough to make a wild dream happen? At this point in my life, I don’t intend on changing paths to become a pharmacist or an FBI agent. What I find comforting though is that I can still be a singer, actor or published author alongside my day job. I can still lean into the visions of making a positive impact and using my voice.
Five years ago, I made a big scary goal to be published. I thought I would write a book or publish poetry by the time I was out of college. Well, I’m out of college and that didn’t happen, BUT what I found is that I can still be a writer without a book. I can still share messages. If your why is strong enough, you will figure out the how. My why to share meaningful content for others has led me to this blog. But my worry about an oversaturated market almost kept me from doing that too! Thank god for some encouraging friends! (Shoutout Sophie) It’s okay for dreams to take a different shape then when you first envisioned them. It’s okay to pivot and find something that better aligns with your goals. Life is constantly changing and evolving, so shouldn’t our goals? Maybe I will publish a book in the next 5 or 10 years. Maybe I’ll lean into a completely different passion. Only time will tell. Regardless of what I pursue, I'm going to jump before I'm ready, start scared, and dream really big. Because there is no execution without visualization and putting yourself out there. I'm done stomping out dreams before they even start.